My Life My Journey

It's All About My World

Depression at Work 18/06/2016

Filed under: Various Informations — humme @ 8:21 am

Depression at Work: Is It You or the Job?
By Laurie Sue Brockway, Everyday Health Staff Writer

(Note: Edited by eliminating 1 case example and just focusing on the writing about depression itself)


Work Stress vs. Work Depression

We have all felt stressed at work. There are those awful days when everything seems to go wrong, when miscommunication is rampant, and you just can’t seem to get along with a boss, employee, or colleague. People are always getting their buttons pushed in the workplace because it becomes our second home and we tend to replicate family dynamics and relationships that mirror those with parents and siblings. It can be aggravating and upsetting.

Not everyone has a dramatic story, but a recent Gallup Poll showed that although the unemployed reported a higher rate of depression (11.4 percent), 5.6 per cent of full time workers also said they were depressed.

Some mental health and human resources professionals think work can cause depression, others say an individual has to be vulnerable to it in some way or that it is related to their personal baggage, not necessarily to work.


Is Your Job Really the Culprit in Depression?

“Work can’t actually cause depression,” said Clare Miller, director of the Partnership for Workplace Mental Health, an arm of the American Medical Association designed to help employers deal with and strengthen employee mental health. “If someone is predisposed to actually having depression, work can be a force of good or could be harmful. But someone can’t get depression simply from work. There need to be some other things going on there.”

Mental pain and suffering at work is not a small problem, though, and it does not just impact the individual. According to research released by Miller’s organization in May 2013, depression is a leading cause of lost productivity in the United States, costing employers $44 billion annually.

Elizabeth R. Lombardo, PhD, MS, PT, a Lake Forrest, Ill., psychologist and author of A Happy You: Your Ultimate Prescription for Happiness, attributes this to what psychologists call “learned helplessness.”

“This is the sense that one has no control over their job – for fear of losing it, not having any power to make decisions, not having any control to make things better,” said Dr. Lombardo, adding that you may feel “powerless to make any changes or have an influence on the situation.”

Symptoms of depression that comes from learned helplessness may include:

  • Giving up – not trying to make a difference
  • Social withdrawal
  • Passivity
  • Decreased effectiveness at work
  • Decreased problem-solving ability
  • Procrastination
  • Frustration
  • Low self-esteem


Some of the Causes of Workplace Depression

Leigh Steere is co-founder of Managing People Better, LLC, a research organization that studies gender and generational differences in management styles and other management topics. She cited multiple causes of workplace depression.

“Work-related depression can have internal causes, external causes, or some of both,” said Steere, offering these examples:

Internal causes of workplace depression:

  • A wrong-fit role. A person feels called to be an artist but is working as an accountant.
  • Misalignment between company and personal values. Keeping a job where there is ethical discomfort.
  • Working parent guilt. “I like my work but feel I should be spending more time with my child.”
  • Interpersonal discomfort. Having to interface with people who are unpleasant or simply have different preferences, personalities, or work styles.
  • Work/life imbalance. Workaholism and working long hours even when not asked and missing out on social connection outside of work, as well as hobbies, opportunities to relax, and exercise.
  • Introvert/extrovert stress. A person may be an extrovert working in a role or environment where there is insufficient people interaction; or an introvert working in a bullpen-style office with constant interruptions, no privacy, and insufficient opportunity to “go internal.”
  • Financial struggles. Maybe compensation and benefits do not meet the worker’s basic needs.
    Feeling trapped. “I really want to leave this job, but I can’t because (name your reason).” This may be a realistic assessment or a fear-based reaction.

External causes of workplace depression:

  • Unreasonable demands from management. This may include requests to work frequent overtime, which interferes with home life.
  • Unclear guidance at work. Some employees don’t understand what is expected, so they feel they are in the dark and uncertain about whether they are doing a good job.
  • Poor project practices. This may result in miscommunication, missed deadlines, blown budgets, or products that miss the mark. People want to be on a winning team that produces good work, but barriers to accomplishing this can contribute to depression.
  • Bullying at work. Bullying behaviors faced in the workplace can be a huge problem for some employees, whether they’re bullied by bosses, co-workers or clients.
  • Low morale or low engagement at work. This may happen due to the way a company spins information rather than being transparent, puts blame for leadership mistakes on others, nickel-and-dimes employees in the name of cost containment, and rewards ineffective managers.
  • Poor working conditions. There are many conditions that become problematic when management will not take corrective action, for example, not letting employess take enough breaks, or ignoring safety concerns and temperature discomfort.

When Employees Feel Trapped
Feeling like you have hit a dead end can add to depression, said Lisa Bahar, LMFT, LPCC, a family therapist and clinical counselor, in Dana Point, Calif.

“When an individual is in a job that lacks growth and is fostering complacency, there is a [sense of] a lack of worth,” she said. “They feel innately that their value is not as high as they would like. Yet there may be a fear to ask for more support since there is a sense that they are not valued by the organization. This can make individuals feel trapped.”

Because they need money (which is, of course, a very common concern), they stay in jobs that are crushing their spirits. “This creates a resentment which is the beginning of depressive symptoms that can actually mutate into aggressive and maladaptive behaviors at work,” said Bahar. “It creates a cycle in an individual of feeling guilty, angry, resentful and trapped.”

–Case 1–

A guy called M:

“They start asking me to give up more freedom, and I start to get depressed and I don’t want to be there anymore.”

When he feels upset and depressed, he acts out negatively. “I start to show up late because I don’t want to be there,” he said. “I tend to have little panic attacks before I go into work so it takes me a little bit longer to get out. I’m usually in a very good mood, but when I get there I’m just about work. I don’t want to talk to anybody or be friends with anybody. I don’t show it to my clients, but my coworkers all can tell. They are like, ‘Don’t bother him.'”

To try to get himself through, M is trying physical exercise — kickboxing. “I’m so depressed right now I do that sometimes six times a week,” he said. “I love what I do, I just don’t love where I do it.”

Lombardo thinks exercise is a good way to work off steam, and workers have to somehow take back their sense of control in any situation that is adding to their distress.

“While you cannot control others or the situation at all times, you always have the ability to control how you view it,” she said. “This does not mean just think happy thoughts — for example, ‘I love my boss — when that is the furthest thing from the truth. It does mean finding the good even in tough times. For example, ‘I am grateful to be employed and can look for ways to either improve this job or find something else while I am still getting paid.’ Or, ‘I know my boss seems overbearing and I realize that is more a function of her own insecurities, not evidence that I am not good at what I do.'”


How Do You Know When It’s Time to Go?

Rhonda Richards-Smith, LCSW, a mental health expert in Los Angeles, says depressed employees have to pull back and figure out why their situations are untenable and look at what keeps them there.

“Take the time to stop and examine why you have chosen to remain in your current position,” Richards-Smith said. “Job security? Great benefits? Do you feel you are incapable of doing anything else? Be honest with yourself and know that you are in control of the decisions you make, including whether you stay or go.”

Steere says most companies do not have a psychologist on staff to help employees sort through depression, but she suggests the human resources department may be able to help.

“HR can take the lead in listening for problems and by asking questions and being willing to hear sometimes unpopular input,” she said. “When companies take the initiative to fix a known problem, that helps all employees feel better about the organization and the work they are doing. When companies stick their heads in the sand and either fail to see a problem or choose not to correct it, employees face a tough choice. Do they stick it out and live with the environment as is? Or is it time to look for greener pastures?”


All rights reserved to the original writer and website owner where it was published.


The Advocate

Filed under: About Me,My Personality — humme @ 6:20 am

My type of personality is INFJ-T aka. THE ADVOCATE

Everything explained here are so correct that it feels awesome and I would like to share it. I get misunderstood a lot but it’s a bother for me to explain it so sometimes I just let it be. I hope people reading this will at least know why I am who I am.

~~The Advocate~~

The Advocate personality type is very rare, making up less than one percent of the population, but they nonetheless leave their mark on the world. As members of the Diplomat Role group, Advocates have an inborn sense of idealism and morality, but what sets them apart is that they are not idle dreamers, but people capable of taking concrete steps to realize their goals and make a lasting positive impact.

Advocates tend to see helping others as their purpose in life, but while people with this personality type can be found engaging rescue efforts and doing charity work, their real passion is to get to the heart of the issue so that people need not be rescued at all.
Advocate personality


Help Me Help You

Advocates indeed share a very unique combination of traits: though soft-spoken, they have very strong opinions and will fight tirelessly for an idea they believe in. They are decisive and strong-willed, but will rarely use that energy for personal gain – Advocates will act with creativity, imagination, conviction and sensitivity not to create advantage, but to create balance. Egalitarianism and karma are very attractive ideas to Advocates, and they tend to believe that nothing would help the world so much as using love and compassion to soften the hearts of tyrants.

Every man must decide whether he will walk in the light of creative altruism or in the darkness of destructive selfishness.

Martin Luther King


Advocates find it easy to make connections with others, and have a talent for warm, sensitive language, speaking in human terms, rather than with pure logic and fact. It makes sense that their friends and colleagues will come to think of them as quiet Extroverted types, but they would all do well to remember that Advocates need time alone to decompress and recharge, and to not become too alarmed when they suddenly withdraw. Advocates take great care of other’s feelings, and they expect the favor to be returned – sometimes that means giving them the space they need for a few days.

Live to Fight Another Day

Really though, it is most important for Advocates to remember to take care of themselves. The passion of their convictions is perfectly capable of carrying them past their breaking point and if their zeal gets out of hand, they can find themselves exhausted, unhealthy and stressed. This becomes especially apparent when Advocates find themselves up against conflict and criticism – their sensitivity forces them to do everything they can to evade these seemingly personal attacks, but when the circumstances are unavoidable, they can fight back in highly irrational, unhelpful ways.

To Advocates, the world is a place full of inequity – but it doesn’t have to be. No other personality type is better suited to create a movement to right a wrong, no matter how big or small. Advocates just need to remember that while they’re busy taking care of the world, they need to take care of themselves, too.

Advocates You May Know


Useless Complaint 18/05/2012

Barusan aku ke alfamart. Seperti biasa, beli cemilan untuk bekal di hari libur seperti ini. Setelah beli beberapa cemilan dan es krim, aku ke kasir dan antri. untung antrian ga begitu panjang, takut es krim ku keburu meleleh. Saat tiba giliran ku untuk bayar, ada seorang bapak yang tiba-tiba motong mau komplain soal harga.

Bapak A    :        Mbak, barang yang ini kan saya lihat di rak ada potongan harga, harganya jadi 21.400 koq di struk 22.900

Kasir          :        Iya pak, semua potongan harga ditulis di bawah sekali, bukan di bawah setiap barang.

Bapak itu kelihatan masih kurang puas dan melanjutkan komplain nya.
Sementara aku yang merasa kesal karena antrianku dipotong, makin kesal karena si Bapak masih ngotot.

Bapak A    :        Iya, kan potongan nya itu per satuan jadi 21.400

Kulihat di struknya jumlah item yang dipersoalkan itu adalah 1. Berarti Bapak itu memang beli barang itu sebanyak 1, kenapa pake bilang per satuan segala. Ga nyambung!

Kasir          :        Kan di bawah ditulis Bapak dapet potongan harga 2.500, dari belanja Bapak [sekian] jadi [sekian].

Aku udah males dengernya. Sebenarnya semua sudah jelas, bahwa bapak itu komplain tanpa mikir lagi, padahal si kasir juga menerangkan dengan jelas bahwa potongan 1.500 yang Bapak itu peroleh sudah digabung dengan potongan dari barang yang lain, sehingga dia mendapat total potongan harga 2.500

Di luar dugaan, bapak itu, mungkin masih ogah mikir, malah mengulang perkataan yang sama.

Bapak A    :        Potongan nya kan per satuan jadi 21.400

Aku makin tidak sabaran, ntar es krim ku keburu cair lagi. Maka kupotong perdebatan mereka, sambil menyodorkan es krim aku bilang

Aku           :        Mbak, eskrim ku tolong dihitung dulu.

Terus mbak nya jadi ga enakan lalu mulai menghitung belanjaan ku, dan si bapak itu langsung kabur tanpa bilang apa-apa lagi. Maaf kek, atau apa.

Makanya pak, kalo mau komplain , harusnya diteliti dulu, bener apa ga ada kesalahan.
Terus, kalo menerima penjelasan orang itu, mbok ya telinga dibuka lebar-lebar, perhatiin ada benarnya ga, jangan berpikir hanya bapak yang benar.

Satu lagi, yang terpenting, jangan nyerobot antrian orang. Kalo mau komplain, ya tunggu sampe orang yang udah antri selesai urusannya. Wong setelah aku, belum ada lagi orang yang antri koq.

Kebiasaan banget orang-orang tuh, ga bisa disuruh antri, maunya duluan aja. Dan aku paling sebel kalo antrianku diserobot orang dalam hal apapun itu (bank, minimarket, rumah makan, tempat beli karcis, dsb), dan oleh siapapun itu, mau anak kecil maupun nenek-nenek. Pokoknya semua harus antri! Ga ada alasan macem-macem.



Lesson to Read 16/05/2012

Lesson to Read


Kelas 3.1 sedang dalam pelajaran matematika.

Guru          :          Ibu punya permainan untuk kalian. Disini Ibu akan beri kalian 1 soal untuk diselesaikan. Soal ini merupakan contoh soal di sebuah buku yang ada di perpustakaan. Tentunya sedikit diubah. Ibu beri waktu 30 menit. Tugas kalian hanyalah menemukan buku tersebut dan mendapatkan jawabannya. Siapa yang berhasil akan mendapat bonus nilai 10 yang akan membantu kalian saat ujian nanti. Nah, sekarang permainan dimulai.

Seluruh siswa kelas 3.1 bergegas ke perpustakaan untuk mencari buku yang dimaksud. Setelah 30 menit berlalu, mereka kembali ke kelas.

Guru          :           Bagaimana? Sudah menemukan bukunya?

Siswa 1     :           Kami sudah berbagi tugas bu, mencari di semua buku di perpustakaan.Jadi kalau ada yang menemukan bukunya, harus memberitahu semua. Tapi sayangnya buku itu tidak berhasil kami temukan bu.

Guru          :           Aneh, padahal ada koq bukunya di perpustakaan, apa dipinjem ya… <Tersenyum>

Siswa 2     :           Yaaa… Ibu. Jadi kami tidak dapat bonus nilai ya.

Guru          :           Tidak apa-apa. Sekarang kalian keluarkan kertas dan coba jawab soal tersebut. Ibu beri waktu 10 menit. Setelah selesai, kumpulkan ke depan.

Sepuluh menit telah berlalu, murid-murid mengumpulkan hasil pekerjaannya ke depan dan Ibu Guru mulai memeriksa satu persatu.

Guru          :           Hmm, ternyata dari 40 siswa yang ada disini, tidak kurang dari 40% bisa menjawab dengan benar.

Siswa 3 berbisik dengan teman sebangkunya.

Siswa 3     :           Berapa orang tuh?

Siswa 4     :           16 orang, ada 16 orang yang bisa jawab. Lu bisa jawab?

Siswa 3     :           Bisa sih, tapi ga tau bener apa ga.

Siswa 4     :           Ah elu, coba gue nyontek tadi.

Guru          :           Kalian tidak ada yang bisa menemukan bukunya, tapi bisa menjawab soal ini, kenapa?

Para siswa berbisik-bisik.

Guru          :           Karena di antara 40 siswa, 16 orang ini adalah yang benar-benar membaca. Saat kalian membuka setiap buku yang ada di perpustakaan, kalian membaca untuk mencari jawabannya. Meski kalian tidak menemukan jwaban soal, apa yang sudah kalian baca, sudah membantu kalian untuk menyelesaikan soal.

Siswa 5     :           Yah, gue ga baca, Cuma langsung llihat contoh soalnya, sama apa enggak.

Siswa 6     :           Hahaha… Iya. aku juga.

Guru melanjutkan.

Guru          :           Pelajaran yang bisa kalian petik adalah yang terpenting dalam mencapai tujuan bukanlah hasil melainkan proses. Proses menemukan jawaban, Proses perjuangan, Proses dalam meraih kesuksesan.

Siswa-siswa merenung. Bu Guru mengeluarkan sesuatu dari tasnya dan mengangkatnya tinggi.

Guru          :           Buku ini cuma ada satu-satunya di perpustakaan.

Siswa         :           Whaaa, Ibu curang…

Guru          :           Hmm… <Tersenyum> Jangan hanya bertumpu pada hasil yang ingin kalian capai. Tapi lakukan prosesnya dan nikmati. Saat kalian melompati semua proses dan langsung menuju hasil, kalian akan kecewa jika tidak menemukan apa yang kalian inginkan. Dan yang lebih penting lagi, kalian sudah melewatkan semua kesenangan yang ada dalam proses meraih hasil.

Siswa-siswa mendengarkan dengan serius.

Guru          :           Jadi, membaca itu berguna kan? Hehe. Okay, begitu saja, 16 orang tadi akan mendapat bonus nilai. Kelas bubar.

Setelah kelas bubar, siswa-siswa masih memperbincangkan pelajaran yang tadi mereka terima.

Siswa 5     :           Kita kayak belajar Filosofi bukannya Matematika.

Siswa 1     :           Tapi di situlah letak menyenangkannya ya.

Siswa 2     :           Ibu itu cerdas. Dengan cara ini dia sudah membuat kita membaca dan dan menyadari pentingnya membaca.

Siswa 4     :           Kalo kata gue, Ibu itu jenius.

Siswa 6     :           Ah, mulai sekarang aku mau baca ah!

Di ruang Guru.

Guru Bahasa Inggris            :       Tadi rame banget bu di perpustakaan oleh siswa kelas Ibu. Ada tugas ya?

Guru Matematika                :       Iya, Bu.

Guru Bahasa Inggris            :       Ah, anak-anak jaman sekarang, kalau ada tugas aja, baru ke perpustakaan!

Guru Matematika                :       <tersenyum>

Sejak hari itu, perpustakaan selalu ramai oleh siswa kelas 3. Mereka bukan hanya membaca buku Matematika, tapi juga banyak buku lainnya.


Good Deeds Turn Out To Be Sins 06/05/2012

Filed under: My Thoughts — humme @ 2:21 pm
Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

I often wonder to myself, this world consists of good and bad people.
But somehow, it’s not that simple to classify humans into that two terms.
It’s complicated because while some people might consider a person as a bad person, his close acquaintances might think the otherwise.
Human have purposes of living in this world, right?
And one of those purposes is said, to do good deeds to others.
But to whom we should consider doing good deeds?
Because sometimes those people to whom we do good deeds, don’t really remember about it, or even worse, turn out to be evil to us. What should we do when that happens?
Should we stop doing good deeds to them?
Then do we resent them for being ungrateful?
Perhaps it struck us to think that maybe we just happen to meet the wrong persons. But is it our fault?
This kind of thing eventually can lead us to be skeptic and lose trust in humanity.
Because the fact that sometimes doing good deed seems so unworthy.
Some people might respond that we should not hope for anything in return from doing good things.
But we can’t pretend that it doesn’t hurt us, to know that we’re being harmed by those people whom we cherish.
Is it some kind of test? To see whether we do the good deeds for gaining only God’s favor or not.
If we resent those bad persons and regret doing good deeds to them, then our good deeds would have no worth at all.
Then what’s the point in doing good deeds?
What do those bad people get as the payment of their evilness?
Does it make them the sinners?
But do we also the sinners?
Why do good deeds turn out to be sins?
If this keeps going on, it does make me wonder,
How can we prevent this from happening again in the future?


Maafkan Aku Dunia

Filed under: My Poems — humme @ 1:19 pm
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Maafkan aku dunia.

Kebencianku pada semua yang tak sesuai harapanku membuatku memberontak dan menyakitimu.

Padahal aku tak dapat menyakiti siapapun melainkan diriku sendiri.

Maafkan aku dunia.
Kini ku sadar. Aku yang salah.

Dari dulu bukankah aku telah tahu bahwa aku tidak boleh berharap padamu. Karna yang akan kudapat hanyalah sakit hati.

Dulu bukankah aku telah tahu bahwa aku hanya boleh berharap pada Tuhan Yang Maha Sempurna.

Dulu bukankah aku telah tahu bahwa aku hanya bisa percaya dan mengandalkan diri sendiri.

Sekarang aku telah sadar.
Marilah kita berteman dunia.
Aku tak akan membencimu lagi.
Karna ternyata membencimu membuatku kehilangan diriku sendiri.

Maafkan Aku…


Korean Variety Shows

Belakangan ini, aku lagi hobi nonton Variety Shows Korea dari internet.

Berikut, daftar variety show yang sudah pernah kutonton sebagian episodenya :


GOM – Making The Artist

KBS – 1 Night and 2 Days

KBS Drama – Miracle Show

KBS World – Let’s Go Dream Team

KBS World – Quiz Expedition

KBS2 – Game Show Unbelievable Challenge

KBS2 – Happy Together

KBS2 – I Have An Uncle

KBS2 – Immortal Song

KBS2 – Sang Sang Plus

KBS2 – Song Battle

KBS2 – Star Golden Bell

KM – Idol World

MBC – Come To Play

MBC – Golden Fishery

MBC – Infinity Challenge

MBC – Introducing Star’s Friends Survival

MBC – Let’s Sleep Here Tonight

MBC – Love Survival Show

MBC – Nodaji

MBC – Star Dance Battle

MBC – We Got Married

MBC Every1 – Family Needed

MBC Every1 – Flower Boy Generation

MBC Every1 – Idol Army S02

MBC Every1 – Idol Army S03

MBC Every1 – Idol Army S05

MBC Every1 – Infinity Girls

MBC Every1 – The Teacher Is Coming

Mnet – Art of Seduction

Mnet – Dartstrike

Mnet – Hot Blood

Mnet – It’s Time

Mnet – Scandal

Mnet – Star VJ Show

Mnet – Super Junior Mini Drama

Mnet – Welcome To Wonderland

Mnet – Wild Bunny

Mnet – You Can Fly

SBS – Exploration of Human Body

SBS – Family Outing S01

SBS – Heroes

SBS – Intimate Note

SBS – Love Letter

SBS – Quiz of Sixth Sense

SBS – Running Man

SBS – Star King

SBS – Strong Heart

SBS – X-Man

SBS – Ya Shim Man Man

TvN – Taxi


Aku suka variety show korea karena sangat menghibur. Beberapa sampai membuatku tertawa lepas melihat tingkah polah mereka. Konsepnya pun beragam. Ada yang berupa talk show, ada yang berupa game show, ada juga yang berupa performance, baik dance, lagu, maupun parodi.

Satu hal yang kukagumi dari mereka adalah naluri mereka bekerja keras untuk menampilkan yang terbaik. Sungguh inspiratif.


%d bloggers like this: